I understand that the world is totally unfair in ways, but why must it also be cruel? Why must the Veteran that gave his country 42 years of his life be given a cruel situation? Why is it that some people can spend thousands maybe even millions of dollars on STUFF, but yet some people can't afford to even pay for their own meal? I'm not talking about the people you can't afford it because of drugs or gambling, I'm talking about the people that worked their asses off for years, lost everything, and yet the government doesn't care. The government cares about those who made the bad choice to gamble or buy drugs, and eventually got themselves in that situation, but they don't care about those who lost their job, then their home, then their family, just because they chose a job that got cut out by foreigners. Why must they be so cruel? How are you to deal with that?
Drama. Why do people have to be so dramatic? I understand TV show dramas, but in real life? Get over yourself. What makes you better than the next person? I've always been taught if you don't want to be put in a situation, don't put yourself there in the first place. If you didn't want to end up the way you did, then you shouldn't have made those decision that you did. But you did, and now you have to deal. You've go to live with those consequences, and move on. Some times it's not worth trying to fix something that you've fixed time and time again. You just move on.
Tuesday, October 23, 2012
Wednesday, October 10, 2012
Society.
I'm having trouble understand society these days. I'm a girl average height and weight, but with curves. Today I went shopping for new jeans, and found nothing. 23 pairs, and nothin'. I find that to be slightly ridiculous. I can't be the only girl that has this shape and this problem. I don't want to wear skinny jeans, even though that was the fashion, I want to wear my normal boot cut jeans. The way that society makes everything out to be it just not fair to everyone.
Also, now it's the common thing to only have one best friend. Having multiple friends is a great thing, and so is having that best friend, but you can have more that one right? Well I guess not. I've always felt that it was one thing to be dependent on one person, but to be so far engrossed in them that you forget about everybody else is just going to far. There are so many people in this world that it's a good thing to know many people and stay active in their lives as well.
Maybe I'm just crazy, but I think everyone is just too engrossed in this image that the country has produced.
Also, now it's the common thing to only have one best friend. Having multiple friends is a great thing, and so is having that best friend, but you can have more that one right? Well I guess not. I've always felt that it was one thing to be dependent on one person, but to be so far engrossed in them that you forget about everybody else is just going to far. There are so many people in this world that it's a good thing to know many people and stay active in their lives as well.
Maybe I'm just crazy, but I think everyone is just too engrossed in this image that the country has produced.
Tuesday, October 2, 2012
Past meets Present
Why do I always find it so hard to just do what I really want? Saying the truth to a significant other, saying your true feelings to a person being mean to you, telling others your real opinion even though it is the very opposite of theirs.
I found out recently that even your oldest friends can be lying directly to your face. They say what they believe you want to hear, not what you actually want to hear. I've always believed that you need to own up to your words, because even though they may be harsh, sometimes the other person needs to hear this. If your shirt is tucked into your underwear, you would want someone to tell you, right? Some goes with feelings and emotions. You wan to know how the other person is feeling so you can fix it. Without the truth, nothing can change.
Why is it so hard to let yourself just fall for another person? Trust? Insecurities? Either way, it's so hard but yet everyone always says it's worth it in the end. But is it truly? In the past, I know how hard it has been for me to trust, but recently I have been finding that I can trust, but I might just be too afraid to do so. I'm always waiting for that moment I'm going to get hurt, for that moment that will break me. I know better that it won't happen, but it is better to be prepared right? I've never really thought about the future in the aspect of getting married, living in a house, having cook outs in the back yard, but lately that has been sounding more and more like something I want. But I'm scared to let that dream become a reality. Does the other person want that? Is that something I can do?
I guess you never really know what you want unless you just try it.
I found out recently that even your oldest friends can be lying directly to your face. They say what they believe you want to hear, not what you actually want to hear. I've always believed that you need to own up to your words, because even though they may be harsh, sometimes the other person needs to hear this. If your shirt is tucked into your underwear, you would want someone to tell you, right? Some goes with feelings and emotions. You wan to know how the other person is feeling so you can fix it. Without the truth, nothing can change.
Why is it so hard to let yourself just fall for another person? Trust? Insecurities? Either way, it's so hard but yet everyone always says it's worth it in the end. But is it truly? In the past, I know how hard it has been for me to trust, but recently I have been finding that I can trust, but I might just be too afraid to do so. I'm always waiting for that moment I'm going to get hurt, for that moment that will break me. I know better that it won't happen, but it is better to be prepared right? I've never really thought about the future in the aspect of getting married, living in a house, having cook outs in the back yard, but lately that has been sounding more and more like something I want. But I'm scared to let that dream become a reality. Does the other person want that? Is that something I can do?
I guess you never really know what you want unless you just try it.
Sunday, September 30, 2012
Today's World.
I don't understand the world today. Call me old fashioned, call me crazy, call me insane, I don't care. There is no reason for why the world is the way it is today. When a guy has almost nothing in the world, why would be push away the only thing that still believes in him. Is he scared? Or is he just that much of a terrible person? I know I don't have a whole lot of room to talk, due to the terrible history with men, but I do know how I am when I get scared. I push and push until I eventually make the other person walk away. I know it's wrong, but it's the only thing that protects me from getting hurt.
I think everyone just needs to take a step back and just breathe for a second. Look at the world around you, and think. Is this the way you want to live? Is this the action you want to choose? Will you regret it later on? I try to live with no regrets. Actions happen, maybe it was the wrong choice, but at the time that's what I chose and I have to live with my actions. Granted, I have not made a choice that ended in a terrible way, but I have made more than my fair share of mistakes. I look at my actions that those of others, look at the results and think "Do I want to live this way?"
I think everyone just needs to take a step back and just breathe for a second. Look at the world around you, and think. Is this the way you want to live? Is this the action you want to choose? Will you regret it later on? I try to live with no regrets. Actions happen, maybe it was the wrong choice, but at the time that's what I chose and I have to live with my actions. Granted, I have not made a choice that ended in a terrible way, but I have made more than my fair share of mistakes. I look at my actions that those of others, look at the results and think "Do I want to live this way?"
Sunday, September 23, 2012
To sink, or to swim?
I don't understand how one day everything can be going great, then the next, it's like everything just fell out of place. The beginnings of new relationships are so cute. All mushy, adorable, and you feel on top of the world. Then you get the news. The news that your relationship is going to be put on the high seas, and it is up to you to find out of your going to sink or swim. You try to work as a partner swimming together, but then a storm hits. Your communication gets bad and you lose sight of one another for a while. But once you see them again, it's like nothing could go wrong. But then they have to leave again, and you don't know the next time you'll see them. You get put on the back burner, and now you are no longer a priority. It's up to you whether you want to keep swimming, or just let yourself sink.
But you have to take in account all the memories, thoughts of the future, and the feelings you have. The memories of being together are great; you love spending the time together, the feeling you get when your cuddled up watching a movie, and seeing friends and family together. The thoughts for the future make you think all the rough time might be worth it. And the feelings are just like icing on the cake. You feel so happy and safe, warm and fuzzy. But then reality hits you like a bitch. Those memories then crash into the memories of being alone on the night you need them the most, on the days when you just need someone to give you a hug and call you beautiful, and the times when your just reaching out for help and they don't understand. Those thoughts for the future then become back handed with the reality of "what ifs." The "what if" he has to get sent to the military academy,"what if" they don't want the same things, "what if" in a few years from now something terrible happens and it all ends, and the biggest "what if" is the thought that maybe they never cared even close to the same amounts that you did. Then last but not least, those feelings get put knocked out cold. The feeling of being happy just become a distant past and now your just lonely sad, The feeling of being safe, now your just scared. The warm and fuzzy feelings you got when you saw them, now make you terrified and shaky.
You don't know what the next day is going to bring, but it's up to you to figure out what your decision is: Are you going to sink? Or are you going to be fighter and try and swim?
But you have to take in account all the memories, thoughts of the future, and the feelings you have. The memories of being together are great; you love spending the time together, the feeling you get when your cuddled up watching a movie, and seeing friends and family together. The thoughts for the future make you think all the rough time might be worth it. And the feelings are just like icing on the cake. You feel so happy and safe, warm and fuzzy. But then reality hits you like a bitch. Those memories then crash into the memories of being alone on the night you need them the most, on the days when you just need someone to give you a hug and call you beautiful, and the times when your just reaching out for help and they don't understand. Those thoughts for the future then become back handed with the reality of "what ifs." The "what if" he has to get sent to the military academy,"what if" they don't want the same things, "what if" in a few years from now something terrible happens and it all ends, and the biggest "what if" is the thought that maybe they never cared even close to the same amounts that you did. Then last but not least, those feelings get put knocked out cold. The feeling of being happy just become a distant past and now your just lonely sad, The feeling of being safe, now your just scared. The warm and fuzzy feelings you got when you saw them, now make you terrified and shaky.
You don't know what the next day is going to bring, but it's up to you to figure out what your decision is: Are you going to sink? Or are you going to be fighter and try and swim?
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